why does it always have to be me.. i am trying to change already. i

know that my speaking tone is usually sounding stuck up. but thats the

way it is.

for those who dont know whats going on: the committee of the NDOC

passed a comment that i was pretty arrogant when i was discussing with

the officer in charge about how to choir was going to perform for the

NDOC.
the officer told me, just stand in the front and "boost the sound".
i asked him about the number of microphones the choir was given.
he told me 8 mics..
i asked whether they were condenser mics.
he said,"should be la".
i added,"there would be no point in the choir singing if the music is

gonna be blasted too loud and the choir cant be heard".
he said,"go and check with the PA crew about the mic stuff."

off i went.

the choir was not given any song sheets to read off, no cds to listen

too. no time for practices. no matter. the choir can blame itself for

the lack in initiative.

what i am really pissed about is the fact that they are using so many

reasons to bomb me. firstly, they make use of the "Superstar" audition.

saying that i sang well but didnt get in because i was arrogant. how

does singing with the proper etiquette infront of a camera and a legend

in Singapore's music industry, Jimmy Yap, prove to be arrogant. thats

just lame.. if i wasn't good enough in singing pop, just tell me. i

know that i cant sing pop.. my teachers and friends have told me

countless times that i cant sing pop because of my training and my

passion for opera. nvm that.. i dont care.. but looking at joel and

weixin, who both have so much for pop in them. joel has the most

amazing voice that girls would swoon for.. but he didnt get in either.

so would they say that he is arrogant as well? or issit that he is just

NOT WELL KNOWN? hmm i am getting emo. but nvm. they told me that i was

arrogant during the NDOC, of which, i didnt turn up because of a test,

till 10 mins b4 the choir was told to get on the track.

i have come to a general consensus that the school wants its students

to be slaves. anyone who stands up for themselves are considered

defiant. there is a fine line between making demands and requesting, or

is there? would replying to a person ur mic requirements be demanding

after that person asked u for it? its really nonsensical. if i answered

his question, it means that i gave him a reply. it doesnt matter if i

asked for 100 microphones or 1.. the denominator is that i told him my

mic requirements AFTER he asked for them. does that make me demanding

and arrogant? hmm truly this is a question for the ages.

looking back at my christian life, i probably would have neglected it

quite abit when i was rushing through all my projects this past month

or so. now that my exams are coming, i would need God more than ever. i

am trying to pull up my GPA which is shockingly terrible. my peers

would even question whether i passed my 1st year or not. i'd better

start praying hard.